The past bit has been rough. Fighting through intense pulses of depression, a sharp up turn and then another drop. I've come to terms with myself; I've learned a lot about myself. Through criticism of my acting, to the realization that I am saturated by many hobbies, interests, and skills. To focus on only one, feels like I'm selling myself short. To focus on them all, there isn't enough time in the day.
But that is alright. I've stabilized the last few hours. Nothing lasts forever; life will happen, regardless of if you are along for the ride or not. Change happens.
Feelings might change. Nothing is really the way you think it is. You might now how things are in a moment, but why they are that way, is another level of understanding that can not truly be grasped. And that is okay.
My hope is, things get better, rather than worse. My hope for myself, is for me to see, and remember, that things can be okay, and I don't have to be the driving force at every step. If I want to be, I can be, but it is not a requirement of life or living.
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