Mislain Affections

I'm lost. I know I'm lost. Worst yet, I've been lost so long, I'm not sure I want to be found.

My heart cries; isolation

I clamp down hard. I tell myself it is biology; the basic animal in me that makes me feel this way. I tell myself, I've evolved beyond this. I don't need a physical relationship with anyone.

Yet, I know I'm lying to myself. It is becoming a physical pain. My heart beats hard, and I feel it echo like an empty hall; a building kept around because it has historic value, but no more does it serve it's original purpose. Gone are the glory days, when it flourished, and gloried in it's own way. All gone, now, an empty shell. Forgotten, and ignored, for all I know.

I hang by a single hope, that I've tied a knot in, and have sustained for moments too long to really remember but short enough I think I can hold on a little longer.

But I'm running out of hope.

I see ways out, but I know, those ways, will probably lead to a hangman's rope. So for now, I cling a little longer, sway in the directionless breeze, and pray someone finds me, who doesn't have a price tag over their shoulder.